Discussion Questions
As you know by now this story deals, somewhat blithely, with a women’s tennis team. Great fun to write and I hope fun to read. Additionally, perhaps it might raise some thought-provoking questions about intragroup dynamics, along with questions concerning the present-day and future plight of the sandwich generation.
In answering, think in terms of your own group; book club, golf team, running group, tennis team, bridge club, etc.
*
Here is my take on the discussion questions. You may or may not agree.
1 – Of the 6 members on the team, which one comes closest to your personality type? Cici? M.J.? Kate? Bennett? Sally? Mary Julia?
AA – For me, probably Kate. I tend to be too upfront sometimes and Kate does speak her mind, sometimes too often
•
2 – Why do you think Kate and Bennett are such good, longtime friends?
AA – Opposites attract? I think so, in this case. Bennett keeps Kate from going over the line – or tries to. Kate demonstrates to Bennett, constantly, that you can ‘step out’ and it’s okay - sometimes even admirable. They both tamp down and even out the other’s personality.
•
3- We know how they are not alike. How are Cici and Kate alike?
AA –They are both in denial - big time. I don’t think Cici even admitted to herself what she had done until halfway through the tennis season. It took the team van accident to bring Kate to her senses.
*
4 - What is the sandwich generation? Are you part of it? Do you know others who are?
AA –The sandwich generation is the group of people sandwiched in between their parents and their grandchildren. Being part of that generation is a natural consequence of the ages of some of my characters: Bennett, with her mother; Kate, with her daughter. So many middle-aged Americans are now having to deal with raising their grandchildren and at the same time, are becoming responsible for their parents. It seems to be because the older generation is living longer and the younger generation is not as tied to marriage and children as they once were. Sandwiched in-between, the 50 somethings are, in some cases, taking on double duty.
*
5 – Do you think child rearing practices today contribute to developing wayward adults?
AA – Yes, to some extent, but also the general atmosphere contributes. So you give the kid a trophy for just showing up. Does this mean you are a winner if you just show up? I believe a child can be loved and know it and still be expected to live up to his/her best potential.
*
6 – Why does everybody like Mary Julia - despite her rather fundamentalist religious views that would seem to limit her friendships?
AA – Mary Julia (one of my characters that interest me most) has spent her life living inside the box and loving it. What’s not to love? (She married the perfect man for her and deeply loves him. He is devoted to her. She has children she loves and that love her. She is well-off and holds a respected place in the community.) Why should she even consider living anywhere except inside the box and accepting those rules that “inside the box thinking” have taught her? Rather than question any contradictions she might find, she seems to easily put them aside – and marches on her merry way. Her religious upbringing has taught her that Jews are not going to heaven – doesn’t bother her. Also that Gays are sinners –doesn’t mean she can’t be devoted to Sally – etc., etc. Like so many women (and men) I have known, she is a wonderful contradiction in thinking. But then again, aren’t we all.
*
7 –How is the Team of value to each of these players: Kate, Bennett, Sally, and Cici? If you are a member of a group, how does it serve you?
AA – Kate, Bennett, and Sally –use the team as the foundation of their social network. They can come, play the game and feel they are contributing and at the same time, feel they are cared about and loved. Now Cici, on the other hand, uses the team to vent all the frustrations she was never really able to vent in her home life.
*
8 –I have been told by a few of my early readers that they knew what Cici had done when they read – in chapter 32 – “Cici looked out the window as they passed a Sea Island maintenance truck. From the sound of it, it needed a ring job.” Did you? If not, then when did you first suspect her?
AA – That was my first real hint that Cici was perhaps thinking about what she had done.
*
9 – Was Cici justified in doing away with ol’ Buddy?
AA –You bet - in a fictional world.
*
10 - Rate the importance of winning to each team member (#1 being the most important).
AA - Here’s what I say: Mary Julia( 1 ) Cici( 2 ) Bennett( 3 ) Sally( 4 ) M.J.( 4 ) Kate( 4 )
*
11 – Kate won’t entertain the idea of giving up on her child – even for her own good and that of her grandchild. Bennett won’t consider getting more help for her mother – even for her and her mother’s well-being. Do you have members of your group who have problems that are obvious to everyone but them? Just answer yes or no. Don’t discuss this question unless your group has been together for ages!!!!! It ain’t the last one for nothin’.
As you know by now this story deals, somewhat blithely, with a women’s tennis team. Great fun to write and I hope fun to read. Additionally, perhaps it might raise some thought-provoking questions about intragroup dynamics, along with questions concerning the present-day and future plight of the sandwich generation.
In answering, think in terms of your own group; book club, golf team, running group, tennis team, bridge club, etc.
*
Here is my take on the discussion questions. You may or may not agree.
1 – Of the 6 members on the team, which one comes closest to your personality type? Cici? M.J.? Kate? Bennett? Sally? Mary Julia?
AA – For me, probably Kate. I tend to be too upfront sometimes and Kate does speak her mind, sometimes too often
•
2 – Why do you think Kate and Bennett are such good, longtime friends?
AA – Opposites attract? I think so, in this case. Bennett keeps Kate from going over the line – or tries to. Kate demonstrates to Bennett, constantly, that you can ‘step out’ and it’s okay - sometimes even admirable. They both tamp down and even out the other’s personality.
•
3- We know how they are not alike. How are Cici and Kate alike?
AA –They are both in denial - big time. I don’t think Cici even admitted to herself what she had done until halfway through the tennis season. It took the team van accident to bring Kate to her senses.
*
4 - What is the sandwich generation? Are you part of it? Do you know others who are?
AA –The sandwich generation is the group of people sandwiched in between their parents and their grandchildren. Being part of that generation is a natural consequence of the ages of some of my characters: Bennett, with her mother; Kate, with her daughter. So many middle-aged Americans are now having to deal with raising their grandchildren and at the same time, are becoming responsible for their parents. It seems to be because the older generation is living longer and the younger generation is not as tied to marriage and children as they once were. Sandwiched in-between, the 50 somethings are, in some cases, taking on double duty.
*
5 – Do you think child rearing practices today contribute to developing wayward adults?
AA – Yes, to some extent, but also the general atmosphere contributes. So you give the kid a trophy for just showing up. Does this mean you are a winner if you just show up? I believe a child can be loved and know it and still be expected to live up to his/her best potential.
*
6 – Why does everybody like Mary Julia - despite her rather fundamentalist religious views that would seem to limit her friendships?
AA – Mary Julia (one of my characters that interest me most) has spent her life living inside the box and loving it. What’s not to love? (She married the perfect man for her and deeply loves him. He is devoted to her. She has children she loves and that love her. She is well-off and holds a respected place in the community.) Why should she even consider living anywhere except inside the box and accepting those rules that “inside the box thinking” have taught her? Rather than question any contradictions she might find, she seems to easily put them aside – and marches on her merry way. Her religious upbringing has taught her that Jews are not going to heaven – doesn’t bother her. Also that Gays are sinners –doesn’t mean she can’t be devoted to Sally – etc., etc. Like so many women (and men) I have known, she is a wonderful contradiction in thinking. But then again, aren’t we all.
*
7 –How is the Team of value to each of these players: Kate, Bennett, Sally, and Cici? If you are a member of a group, how does it serve you?
AA – Kate, Bennett, and Sally –use the team as the foundation of their social network. They can come, play the game and feel they are contributing and at the same time, feel they are cared about and loved. Now Cici, on the other hand, uses the team to vent all the frustrations she was never really able to vent in her home life.
*
8 –I have been told by a few of my early readers that they knew what Cici had done when they read – in chapter 32 – “Cici looked out the window as they passed a Sea Island maintenance truck. From the sound of it, it needed a ring job.” Did you? If not, then when did you first suspect her?
AA – That was my first real hint that Cici was perhaps thinking about what she had done.
*
9 – Was Cici justified in doing away with ol’ Buddy?
AA –You bet - in a fictional world.
*
10 - Rate the importance of winning to each team member (#1 being the most important).
AA - Here’s what I say: Mary Julia( 1 ) Cici( 2 ) Bennett( 3 ) Sally( 4 ) M.J.( 4 ) Kate( 4 )
*
11 – Kate won’t entertain the idea of giving up on her child – even for her own good and that of her grandchild. Bennett won’t consider getting more help for her mother – even for her and her mother’s well-being. Do you have members of your group who have problems that are obvious to everyone but them? Just answer yes or no. Don’t discuss this question unless your group has been together for ages!!!!! It ain’t the last one for nothin’.